BCS Rantings

It is that time of year! The end of the college football season and, I must admit, a disappointing one. Once again, Mizzou has a solid season, but folds up in the big games and ends up in some random bowl game. I'm not sure if they are officially invited yet, but I do know that it's not going to mean anything. The bowl season has turned into a complete joke to me with 64 out of the 119 total Division 1-A teams going to bowls. I can't wait to see the TCU vs. Northern Illinois match-up in the highly touted Poinsettia Bowl (not joking). Ugh!

I also hate the BCS. It seems that it always comes down to one team that is the undisputed #1 and a coin-flip #2. Ohio State is obviously the best team in the nation and deserves their top ranking and slot in the national championship game. Their opponent is where it gets fuzzy. USC is #2 and I think it's dead wrong. Michigan should be number two right now. They have only one loss on the season and it was to the top ranked OSU team. USC only has one loss, but it was to an UNRANKED Oregon State team. How does a national championship contender lose to Oregon State??? Ridiculous. The only reason that Michigan is not number two is that the coasts don't want to see a midwest rematch. It's stupid, utterly stupid.

I had the chance to see Northwest Missouri State play in their second round playoff game over Thanksgiving Weekend. It was awesome! No I'm not a huge fan, but it's playoff football. Why is Division 1-A the only level that refuses a playoff? I'll tell you why - $$$$$$$$$$$$$!!! It's dead wrong that money determines games when the players don't get paid. There is no way to reationalize the BCS anymore, period. Anyone who thinks it's a good idea can suck it.

Friday Night Lights - Airdate 11/28/06

Maybe it's just me, but this week's episode of Friday Night Lights was pretty weak overall. The main problem is that I find myself not caring all that much about the Lyla/Riggins/Street love triangle, and it got the most attention this week. I like the Saracen/Smash storylines a lot better, even though I think it's borderline retarded that Smash would resort to roids after one bad game in front of a scout.

It seems like they've settled in with a game every other week, which is fine I guess. But it didn't seem like there was any real focus on football this week, which was kind of disappointing. There were some funny moments with the Taylors and their daughter, but that was about it for me. I just find myself wishing that Jason Street would go away altogether. They can't possibly milk the paralysis angle forever can they? Anyway, very disappointing this week, hopefully it will rebound next Tuesday.

Show Rating: 6 out of 10
Overall Season to Date: 9 out of 10

MNF

I was watching Monday Night Football last night, as I always do, and a few thoughts went through my feeble little mind.
I hate Joe Theisman and Tony Corn-hole-ser. Theisman talks like he's the greatest QB to ever play the game. Corn-hole-ser is just a douche-bag. How the hell did he get a gig like that? Whatever.
I am mesmerized by football games that are played in the snow. I love it. I think it truly makes players have to be better than usual. Obviously, neither team played well, but the Seahawks had a better second half than the Pack.
Finally, I can't get enough of watching Brett Favre. I know he's eratic. I know he just throws the ball up on a prayer sometimes, but that boy's got guts. I don't think there's a tougher player in the league right now. 252 straight games? You've gotta be kidding me! He's a machine! I know he needs to retire, if for no other reason than to preserve his quality of life after football. I'm not a big Packers fan, but it will be a sad day for me when he calls it quits.
I always wonder what it's like to be on his team. Do his teammates know that they are playing with one of the best QB's in NFL history? Do they look at him as a coach on the field? Does a coach really have anything to tell him that he doesn't already know? Hmmm......provocative. But the same could have been said when Montana was here in KC. Or, dare I say, when Elway was in his last couple of years.
Things that make you go......., "What the hell was he thinking?"

Real World - Denver

Well, it's time for another season of the reality show that started it all...Real World: Denver! I could not be more excited. I'm finally ready to get back into the real world, after I finally grew sick of the Austin cast, I completely ignored the season in Key West. Judging by the clowns that I've seen on The Duel, I didn't miss much.

The cast is interesting, to say the least.

Jenn - former Oakland Raiders cheerleader. She managed to make out with Alex and Brooke in the very first episode, and probably piss off Colie, since she hooked up with Alex first, and wanted to again. Amazing. This girl has Trishelle potential. The sky is the limit here. Nothing would surprise me.

Alex - As I mentioned above, he made out with two cast members already. Hopefully he's smart enough to avoid a relationship with any of his housemates. I remember Danny and Melinda became bf/gf from pretty much the first day on the Austin cast. BORING! Let's hope Alex branches out a little bit here.

Colie - The producers really outdid themselves on this one. She's a shoe-in for the clingy, crazy girl. I totally see her as the type that makes the insane, screaming 3 am calls to yell at her boyfriend. Yikes. Of course, she has no boyfriend, but she likes making out, rather than baseball, because she's good at it. I'm sure her parents are proud.

Brooke - I really figured she would be the Southern Belle prude this season, only she made out with Jenn and said there was nothing wrong with experimentation. Now, I am all for some girl on girl, but don't these people realize the cameras are running all the time? Maybe I'm too modest, but I probably wouldn't profess things like this on camera. Again, what do her parents think? They really need to do something similar to ESPN full-circle coverage with these types of show. Air the show on one side of my screen, and give the family reactions on the other side. What could be better than this? Someone needs to make this happen.

Davis - The token gay guy. Can't they do something to spice up this role on the show? How about a bull dyke? It just seems played out at this point. I understand that they're trying to get a diverse crowd in the house, but how about going with a different typecast here. Every single person in the house expected that there would be a gay person in the house. Do something else to surprise us.

Stephen - He's the bible beater that can't handle the gay guy. Of course they had to cast him...again, just a little too predictable for me. I don't really know anything else about him, because that's all that they really mentioned about him on the premiere.

Tyrie - I love this guy because he makes me think of that "Mad Real World" Chappelle Show skit. Probably the funniest skit on any sketch comedy show ever. Anyway, I think this guy will probably end up with the most groupies, and he will also be the most likely person to contract VD during his stay in Denver. He even said the first thing he was going to unpack was a box of condoms. Obviously, he's a subtle guy. I found the link to the Mad Real World, and here it is:



Overall, it should be a great season. It seems like most of the group doesn't have any inhibitions. When the prude is making out with other chicks in week 1, I think we pretty much know what we're in for over the course of the season.

Episode rating: 8 out of 10
Season potential: 10 out of 10

Turkey for You, Turkey for Me.

I think I can easily say that Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday of the year. Hands down.
I know a lot of people like Christmas because of presents, others like Easter because of the candy, blacks like Kwanzaa because.....well......I don't know why, and women love Valentine's Day (so does Hallmark).
Thanksgiving is the King of the holidays in my book. What other day of the year is it not only ok, but it's expected that I eat myself into a food induced coma? What other day is it expected that I sit on my fat butt and do nothing but watch hours of football? And what other holiday produces days, if not weeks, of tasty left overs? I tell you, none, but Thanksgiving.
It's even better when you're married. Inevitably, we always swith off years. This year was at Gina's folks' house. Next year will be at my folks' house. But even though we might not spend the actual day there, we always spend the day after. It's like doubling up on Thanksgiving!! And not to worry, there is good football on Friday as well!
I think I have played my last Turkey Bowl game though (another fantastic tradition). The mind is willing, but the body screams for mercy. I think from now on, instead of playing football on Thanksgiving morning, I'm going to fish instead. Much less painful, and with tastier results. Either that or I might just explore my feminine side and watch a few hours of the Macy's Parade with my wife and 4 daughters!
I hope everyone enjoyed the weekend as much as I.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Hippies.

Best Link Ever

Of course CSI Miami is cheesy, thanks mainly to David Caruso. And that's why you should check out this clip on YouTube...classic!

Xbox 360 - Madden '07

The other night, the wife and I ended up walking into Circuit City. And to make a long story short, I walked out with an Xbox 360 and Madden '07. It was kind of like one of those dreams, where something really good happens, only this time, there was no waking up. Maybe I should pinch myself. Or not. Anyway, I fired it up the last two nights and here are my thoughts:

- The graphics are absolutely incredible. I can't believe I was ever amazed by Tecmo Bowl. It seems like it was about 6 lifetimes ago. Seriously, in another 20 years, what are these games going to be like? I played a game in the rain, and I could see stadium reflections in the water on the grass. Trent Green looks like Trent Green. I can see the player names on the jerseys from the default birds-eye view camera. It's insane.

- I can turn the system on and off with my controller now. What a great idea. I can't believe nobody ever thought of this before.

- Superstar mode is pretty cool. Basically, you create a guy, sign an agent, work out for a few teams, take an IQ test, do some interviews, enter the combine and get drafted. Then from there, you control yourself (rather than the entire team). It's pretty sweet to try and make it on your own in the NFL, but I'd like to be able to control everything. Probably not a mode I will mess with extensively, but it's a cool little diversion.

- I hate the new menu system. It's just a little more confusing than it needs to be. I guess I will adjust eventually, but it's definitely different than it used to be.

- John Madden and Al Michaels are nowhere to be found, and there is almost a complete lack of any commentary. You kind of get a pseudo-radio broadcast, with the stadium PA guy thrown in as well. I actually prefer this over John and Al putting me to sleep. There's lots of crowd noise and chatter on the field. Overall the sound is very good.

- The new controls are a little tricky. The "sprint" button has always been the A button on previous games, and now it's the right shoulder button. So it's definitely an adjustment, but I'm starting to finally get the hang of it. I think it's probably better to have it that way.

- I still need to mess with Franchise mode, but it should be great like always. I will probably start one up tonight with the Chiefs. Thankfully, Willie Roaf is on the game's default roster, so I should have a pretty decent line. But I'm sure that he and Will Shields will retire after the first year, so I'll have some rebuilding to do for sure. I'll probably post periodic updates as I go along.

Pretty Boys

Josh brought up a good point, Randy Moss sucks. I tend to watch receivers quite a bit because I was one my entire playing career. I've seen many great ones play. Jerry Rice, Steve Largent, Al Toon, Clayton and Duper. What's with the receivers today? For some reason, it seems that now-a-days, the receiver is the position with the most arrogant jerk-offs in the league. Moss, Owens, Johnson, Horn.
I think the thing that upsets me the most is the fact that it's not about the game anymore. It's about who's got the best Soul Train moves after they score. I'm so sick of seeing these idiots trying to be the best dancer in the league instead of being the best football player. Sports Center doesn't help. As much as I love ESPN, they just egg it on.
I was about 5' 10" and weighed only a buck fitty when I played ball in college. I would have given up a testicle to have the size and athleticism as a Randy Moss or a Terrell Owens. Randy Moss is 6' 5" and runs a 4.3 40. I would have been a king with that kind of size. I don't care if he does play for the worst organization in football. He's still getting paid some serious scratch to catch the ball and score some points. He's a total non-factor now. And he'll never be any good ever again.
T.O. is a freak. He's built like a greek god and is easily the strongest, physically, at his position. I watched him drop 3 passes, 2 weeks in a row. Are you kidding me? He's paid to catch the ball. I want to be paid to catch the ball! He's so caught up in being in the headlines, that football is just an after thought. What a waste.
Marvin Harrison, Tony Gonzales (I know he's a tight end, but a damn good one), Jerry Rice, Steve Largent, did you ever see these guys dance? Were they ever in the news for any other reason but being the best at their position? Nope!
My prediction? T.O. vs. Chad Johnson in Dancing with the Stars in a couple of years. Oh yeah, and Randy Moss will get traded and still suck.

KC "Controversy" - continued

Well, Trent Green started yesterday vs. the Raiders and, well, they won. Barely. Green had a grand total of 102 yards passing. His performance was not exactly as bad as that number suggests, but there were a few instances where he showed his rust. In my opinion, there were some throws out there that Huard would have made that Green could not. A win's a win and we'll take it, but I'm still nervous about the pressure he's going to see vs. Denver Thursday night. I guess we'll just have to see...

On an unrelated topic - is there anyone out there that deserves the MVP more than LeDanian Tomlinson??? He's had 19 touchdowns in the last 6 games!!! That is insane! There's nobody in the history of the league that has been on that kind of pace. I will be in awe if anyone else gets it, but since Manning is the NFL's poster child, he probably will have just as good of a chance.

On another unrelated topic to the first unrelated topic - how sorry is Ronnie Brown this year??? I know that I've mentioned this before, but it is getting ridiculous. Yesterday's line - 12 carries, 2 yards, and a fumble. That equated to a grand -1.80 fantasy points (yes, that's a negative). What a slug!!! He and Randy Moss are in the running for the biggest fantasy disappointments of 2006 (Moss had zero catches vs. the Chiefs, by the way - and even Ronald Curry had a catch!). Brutal.

Friday Night Lights research

I thought this would be fun. In the first post ever about the show, Josh mentioned that the entire cast looked a lot older than they should be. They're all high schoolers on the show, but just how old are the actors playing the characters? Well, here's what IMDB says:

Lyla Garrity: 26
Matt Saracen: 24
Tyra Collette: 23
Jason Street: 27
Julie Taylor: 17 (eek!)
Smash Williams: 23
Tim Riggins: 25

Week 11 NFL Picks

Oakland at Kansas City (-9.5)
Josh: ok, ok let's do this
Brent: why are the chiefs always first on the list?
Josh: first one is chiefs (-9.5) over the raiders. you go first
Brent: It's like this site was made specifically for us
Josh: they want our money for sure
Brent: I'm torn on this one, hang on
Brent: Ok, here's what I think. Green will be a little rusty, and we may have a ballgame in the first half...but too much Arrowhead. Chiefs cover
Brent: I'm smelling a huge day out of the secondary
Josh: already disagree. chiefs have a TON of injuries this week, so the Raiders will cover. I still think the chiefs will win, but not by that many

Indianapolis (-1) at Dallas
Brent: Colts favored by one in Dallas. You're up
Josh: Dallas' secondary is terrible, so manning will have another big day. Indy covers
Brent: Yeah, and I'm not still sold on Romo. It just seems to me like Indy's scare was last week. It won't be close this week. Indy wins going away.

Cincinnati at New Orleans (-3)
Josh: saints favored by 3 at home vs. the bungles. go
Brent: Bengals just look like a mess right now. They have some O, but so does New Orleans. I like the Saints, but I don't feel very confident.
Josh: i agree. cincinnati looks like there old selves (except for ocho cinco). Saints cover at home
Brent: ocho cinco. I loved that. I hate the NFL sometimes

Pittsburgh (-3) at Cleveland
Brent: Steelers are a road favorite at Cleveland, spread is 3
Josh: browns played out of their shorts at atlanta last week. Steelers cover this week and big ben has a big day
Brent: I thought you would say that. It's a division game, good rivalry, so I'm going to go with the Browns here. What the heck. My instinct is usually wrong, so I'm going "Costanza" on this pick.
Josh: it's not that big of a reach this year

Tennessee at Philadelphia (-13)
Brent: Next we have Philly favored by 13 at home vs. Tennessee.
Brent: I pick Philly wrong every week. Tennessee really crapped the game last week vs. Baltimore away, so I think Philly takes care of business again. Although I hate picking them because they absolutely demolished Washington last week.
Josh: i can't make myself choose the titans. ever. Philly covers and vince young struggles mightily

Atlanta at Baltimore (-4)
Josh: next is ravens favored by 4 at home vs. the falcons
Brent: you're up
Josh: i still can't believe that ATL lost to the browns at home last week. I don't think they recover and vick never plays well against the ravens' D. Ravens cover
Brent: I think it's dumb, but I'm going to go with the Falcons. Every ounce of logic says I should take the Ravens, but I'm not doing it. Falcons baby!
Josh: if you want to give me $10, just go ahead
Brent: Lunch is on you this week, don't you worry

St. Louis at Carolina (-6.5)
Brent: Panthers favored by 6.5 at home vs. the rams
Josh: go
Brent: Rams did me right this week, and they will do it this week. The Panthers D is great, but the Rams O is pretty good too. That's all I can come up with.
Josh: ok, i'll go with the home team this week. Bolger can't handle panther's pressure and turns the ball over too much. Carolina covers
Brent: Lots of disagreement this week. Are you making your own picks?
Josh: yessir
Josh: win big or lose big

Buffalo at Houston (-2.5)
Brent: Here's a truly shocking moment...Houston is actually favored by 2.5 at home vs. Buffalo
Brent: Shocking that they are actually favored. But I guess Buffalo is god awful.
Josh: this one is a crapper and the only thing I can think of is home field advantage. Texans cover
Brent: McGahee is out, I think. I guess I'll go with the Texans. I'm thinking of starting their tight end this week, so I hope he has a big day. Dallas Clark has been a bust.
Josh: tight ends in general have been pretty quiet this year
Brent: Amen to that. Unless you're playing a WR at TE like the New Orleans guy. What a load of crap.
Josh: i'm still pissed about that too
Brent: Was he a tight end at first, or was he so obscure that Yahoo labeled him incorrectly?
Josh: i have no idea - never heard of him before the season started
Brent: He's a rookie out of Hostra...7th rounder, and he's leading the league in receiving yards.
Josh: stupid

New England (-6) at Green Bay
Brent: Anyway, Pats favored by 6 on the road at Green Bay, my turn
Brent: I'll go with New England here. They just seem due for a bounce back week.
Brent: They won't lay three stinkers in a row
Josh: i'm sick of them and tired of depending on them for fantasy points. favre starts ahead of brady on my team this week and the Pack covers. write it down
Josh: oh, i just did
Josh: nevermind
Brent: Haha

Washington at Tampa (-3)
Brent: The game of the week is next
Josh: r u kidding???
Brent: It's a playoff rematch!
Josh: who cares! they
Josh: are both garbage
Brent: well I'm not arguing with that. Tampa is favored by 3 at home. Thoughts?
Josh: this is another one where i gotta go with the home team. campbell starts for the skins, so barber will have about 8 picks. Bucs cover
Brent: Yeah, go Bucs. Did you know Portis is on IR? I guess they have Duckett, but still.
Josh: yeah, they're done
Brent: There may not be 100 yards of offense combined between the 2 teams

Chicago (-7) at New York Jets
Brent: Bears favored by 7 at Jets
Josh: go
Brent: The Bears are just too tough. I can't pick against them until they really crap one away. Miami is better than people realize, so I dont't think it was necessarily a bad loss for them.
Josh: how do the jets keep winning??? no running back, average qb (at best) and so-so defense. too much chi-town on this one. Bears cover with ditka flying the team plane
Brent: Ditka flying the plane. I like that.
Josh: it's for good luck
Josh: berrian's out this week, which hurts (me)
Brent: By the way, I almost spit food all over myself during the Kelly/Jim bit on the office tonight.
Josh: it was great. that show never disappoints

Minnesota at Miami (-3)
Brent: Dolphins by 3 at home vs Vikings. Go!
Josh: i gotta go with the fins. they have been really hot and i can only hope that ronnie brown scores touchdowns. Dolphins cover
Brent: I can't find a single reason to take the Vikings here, so they sound like a pretty good pick to me. I'll go with them. Like I said, it's opposite week.
Josh: ridiculous

Detroit at Arizona (-2)
Josh: cards by 2 at home over the lions. your turn
Brent: Ridiculous will be the steak dinner you'll owe me next week. Which day are we doing lunch?
Josh: monday. oh yeah, well you suck
Brent: Why the heck are the Cards favored? Oh right, because Detroit is bad enough to lose at home to Frisco. Well let's see, if I had a dartboard, I would just use that. Detroit.
Josh: i actually had this one as my upset, believe it or not. i'll go with Detroit too

San Diego at Denver (-2)
Josh: now this one is the game of the week...
Brent: Real ballsy upset pick
Josh: thanks, i gotta go out on a limb sometimes
Brent: I'm glad you put yourself out there
Brent: And yes, this is the game of the week, without question.
Josh: broncos favored by 2 at home vs. the bolts. Chargers are too much for everything lately. i'll take them in the road upset
Brent: I was typing a Chargers win, but I'm switching to Denver. Phillip Rivers, welcome to Mile High. In-com-plete. Broncos. I just threw up in my mouth.
Josh: what is wrong with you this week. you need your head checked
Brent: By the way, the most annoying sports cliche for me nowadays is everyone being labeled a competitor. Isn't everyone out there a competitor?
Brent: Just thought I'd throw that out there.
Josh: tell that to randy moss

New York Giants at Jacksonville (-3.5)
Brent: And to finish it up, we've got the Jags favored by 3.5 at home against NYG. Since the Jags dicked me over last week, I'm going with the Giants out of spite.
Josh: me too. jags have been too disappointing this year. Giants cover
Josh: there you have it. by the way, the tenacious d movie sneak preview is on MTV. check it out
Brent: Hey I have a proposal...
Josh: yes???
Brent: since Monday's game can't decide lunch, I say we pick the Mizzou/Iowa State game instead.
Brent: Unless you're not man enough of course.
Josh: 'cause you want to go with iowa state right? i'll take Mizzou in that case
Josh: i'm not man enough, but i'll do it anyway
Brent: Yeah what was I thinking? Mizzou....Iowa State has gotten thumped by Kansas and Colorado, no thanks
Brent: I'll get this posted later. I have to go vacuum.
Josh: later

KC "Controversy"

Let me just start by saying that I hate the term "quarterback controversy." It is way over-used in the media and it just sounds lame. But it seems this week that we have ourselves quite the quandry with the Chiefs. Trent Green has now been cleared by the doctors to play, but Damon Huard has been playing extremely well. My opinion: Huard gets the nod and Green backs him up.

As a KC fan, we've been bit by this before. Grbac goes down for several weeks, Gannon comes in and leads the Chiefs into the playoffs, Grbac gets better and Marty gives him the nod, Grbac craps in his hat and the Chiefs go home early. This year has the classic signs of the Grbac-Gannon debacle. I think that you have to leave the hot hand in. Huard was ranked 2nd in the league behind Peyton Manning going into the Miami game. Yes, he looked bad in that game and no, they couldn't score any points against the anemic Fins. But I'm not ready to sit him for just one sub-par performance. Green will tippy-toe around and be extremely nervous (as I'm sure any of us would be) after being extremely concussed.

With the Chiefs sitting at 5-4 with six of the final seven games with AFC opponents, this is their playoffs. I just have to go back to the addage, "If it ain't broke, don't fix it." This offense ain't broke and starting a timid Green won't fix it.

Friday Night Lights Ramblings

Just so you know, dinner tonight consisted of three cheesy gordita crunches from Taco Bell and a bowl of chili from Wendy's. And yes, I've gained 6 pounds in the last month. I actually thought it would be more. Anyway, the cheesy gordita crunch is the best thing on Taco Bell's menu, and it isn't even close...but I digress. On to the show.

Some random things that popped into my head while watching....

-How about the Al Bundy clone that used to be Dillon's star QB? When he was revealing to Coach Taylor that he doesn't run an insurance agency, I was really hoping that he'd say he was a shoe salesman. How did they miss that?

-Jason Street's mother must be really out of whack from her son's injury. She said it had been two months since Jason got hurt, which was much too soon for him to come back and be on the field with his teammates. Two months??? Dillon has played a total of 4 games. I'm no mathematician, but that's impossible. It had been like three weeks. But hey, who's counting?

-Great idea for Riggins's brother and Tyra to organize an alternative homecoming party...complete with strippers and literally a boatload of booze. 20+ kegs, are you kidding me? Now, I attended some pretty crappy parties in college, plenty of them in fact, but there were some good ones in there as well. More than 20 kegs is a TON of booze, especially when you factor in all the other liquor they bought. At the end of the show, they said they made $4,800 before tips, so let's call it an even $5,000. I'm pretty sure they said 20 bucks/person entry, so that comes out to 250 peoplle...1 keg for every 12.5 people. And just think, that's just the cash from the party. So to pay off 20 kegs at what, $60 apiece for piss in a keg, plus strippers, they pocketed only a couple grand. This really isn't a big deal, but I was perplexed by the amount of booze at that party.

-I had a real issue with Smash's storyline, and after the ending, I have an even bigger issue with his story. Has anyone ever explained the recruiting process to this kid? Let's pretend the scout guy worked for Rivals.com, the premier recruiting service in the nation. They look at multiple seasons worth of game film to make their rankings. One game isn't going to change their ideas, especially if Smash's 40, bench and squat are as good as he says they are. Whatever. I guess the kid is just an idiot, which is further proven by his shooting up. Ugh.

-Lyla Garrity looking scandalous yet again. I'm starting to look forward to this every week. Of course, I can say that now that we've verified that she's 26.

-Riggins drying out, only to become the star of the game. Definitely didn't see that coming. But I have to admit, GREAT song choice for his little montage to put Dillon ahead. They couldn't have picked a better song.

-I can't wait until Saracen scores with Taylor's daughter. That will probably be the highlight of the season for me. He'd probably apologize for giving the girl an orgasm.

Can't wait until next week.

Thanks guys

Do you know how hard it is to type right now? Sweat is beading on my forehead. My ears are on fire ( they always get hot when I'm getting worked up about something). I can just hear my 2 blogging cohorts laughing in anticipation of what this will say.
CNN (Communist News Network) had an article about Elton John. It seems ol' twinkle toes doesn't like organized religion. He says, "I think religion has always tried to turn hatred toward gay people. Religion promotes the hatred and spite against the gays." I'm not sure why this article was written, but I guess if you are a famous queer, anyone will listen to you and write it down on CNN. He goes on to say, "There are so many people I know who are gay and love their religion. From my point of view I would ban religion completely. Organized religion doesn't seem to work. It just turns people into really hateful lemmings and it's not really compassionate." Well, why didn't you just say so Johnny? OK, everyone, no more church! All that stuff you believed about God, and your Savior Jesus Christ, call it off. The felchers don't like it!
Give me a break! What kind of superiority complex does this fruiter have? Look, rope-sucker, our religions don't have anything to do with hatred about you. It's the thought of some other dude parking his "bike" in your "rack" that makes us want to vomit. In fact I just did, thanks a lot.
Don't get me wrong, the scriptures will repeat themselves. Genesis 18 and 19 are to always serve as an eternal warning to us. Sodom and Gomorrah were burned with fire and brimstone. The Lord warned them, and they didn't take heed. It will happen again, but on a much broader scale. We've been warned.
OK, I'm back. Wait, was religious Matt just typing? That's OK, he's good.
I want to talk to Elton John right now. He reads our blog you know. Go ahead and get your coalition of fags together and march right out to San Fransisco and have yourselves the world's largest circle jerk and try to get religion banned. You'll just end up walking home with your tail between your legs, actually probably between your boyfriend's legs. Yuck.

Gays suck.
Hippies.

This Weekend in Sports

Lots of stuff going on this past weekend. Some good, some not so good. Here's my rundown.
Chiefs stepped on their collective pee-pees yesterday. Defense stepped it up in the second half, but the offense looked pathetic. Miami is a bad, bad team. If the Chiefs EVER want to take it to the next level, they HAVE to beat the teams thaey are supposed to. Next Sunday is the Raiders at home. Should be a romp, but you never know. Trent Green is supposed to start. He better knock off the cob webs quick or the Raiders' D-line is going to do it for him. Especially with the O-line KC has now. Horrible.
Kevin Harvick won in Phoenix. This race wasn't even close. He was dominant all day. Jimmy Johnson had a chance at the end, but Harvick slammed the door on him. One race to go at Homestead Miami. Johnson leads Kenseth by 63 points and Harvick by 90. Unofficially, all Jimmy has to do is finish 12th or better, no matter where anyone else finishes. That sucks, because I hate anything to do with Jeff Gordon, and he happens to be co-owner of Jimmy's car. My boy, Kenseth still has a chance to win his second championship, but everything has to go right for him, and everything has to go wrong with Jimmy. We'll see how it all plays out.
K-State beat Texas. Are you kidding me? The #4 team in the nation got beat by.....well......Kansas State! No big deal 5 years ago, but now? Holy crap. Nice going Mack Brown. Now, I hate all Kansas schools, but I think I hate Texas schools more, so I guess it's a little bittersweet for me.
MU had the Bye-week, so at least they didn't lose again. Stay tuned.
Chris Shivers won the very first ever Myron Duarte Maui Challenge. The PBR went to Hawaii. They say the area was packed for 3 nights. Shivers rode all 3 bulls to take home almost $13,000.00 for 24 seconds of work. To be honest, I don't think that's enough! The greatest show on dirt!!
Saturday night was the finale for The Ultimate Fighter 4. Matt Cerra beat Chris Lytle in a controversial decision. Cerra is a great wrestler, but Lytle's sprawl was amazing. Cerra was only able to take Lytle down once the entire fight. Lytle actually looked like he got the better of Cerra, but what do I know, I'm not a UFC judge. Travis Lutter beat Patrick Cote in a classic battle. Cote had Lutter hurting when he threw a nasty hay-maker to the small of the ribs, all of the sudden, Cote came at Lutter to finish him off, but he let his guard down and with all the energy he had left, smacked Cote and knocked him silly. Great fight. This weekend, is the weekend I've been waiting for, for about a year. Matt Hughes will defend his title against the French Canadian George St. Pierre. Tim Sylvia will also try to defend his title vs. "The Monster" Monson.
Mayy Hughes is one of the greatest fighters in UFC history. Dominant. No one in his weight class can match his strength and his wrestling skills. St. Pierre is younger and a little quicker, but Hughes, at some point, will demoralize him by picking him up and slamming him to the floor of the Octagon. Then it will only be a matter of time before he starts the ol' ground-and-pound. I'll take Hughes in the second, with a knockout. Monson, is a monster. he's 5 foot 9 and weighs 240!! The dude is straight ripped! If he can get past the 15 inch reach that Sylvia has on him, I think he'll destroy "the maniac".
Well that's my take on this past weekend's sporting events and my outlooks on some of next weekend's. If you don't like it, you're wrong!

Movie Review - The Departed

I finally got around to seeing The Departed this weekend. I would recommend everyone go see it immediately. Great, great show from start to end. I can't recommend it enough.

In a nutshell, the story revolves mainly around Jack Nicholson, Leonardo Dicaprio and Matt Damon (what, no Ben Affleck?). Jack Nicholson is an organized crime boss in Boston, and he has Matt Damon, a state police detective, in his back pocket. The very beginning of the movie alludes to some sort of pre-existing relationship beteween Nicholson and Damon that has apparently continued to present day. Anyway, the third wheel of the movie is Leonardo Dicaprio, a state police reject who is offered a gig as an undercover agent. The thing is, almost nobody knows the identities of the undercover guys, so while Dicaprio and Damon are essentially working for the same people, neither are aware of it. By the same token, Damon and Dicaprio are also working for Nicholson, but neither is aware of the others involvement.

The best way to describe the movie plot without giving anything away (because everyone is going to see it for themselves) is a game of cat and mouse. Damon is working with Nicholson, and tips him off to a mole in his organization. At the same time, Damon's superiors are aware of a mole in their organization as well. It sounds kind of confusing, but it's all done very well.

As for my final impression of the movie, I think I can best sum it up this way...it's two and a half hours long, and I feel they probably should have made it even longer. This movie could have been 4 hours long and it would have been even better. You can't say that about any movies that are made anymore. Go out and see it now.

Overall Rating: 10 out of 10

Movie Review - Saw III

Friday night, I saw the third movie in the "Saw" series. To sum up the first to movies in two sentences, there is a demented guy out there named Jigsaw, who creates these twisted game for people to play. If they can't succeed at their game, such as being forced to unlock a bear trap around their head by digging the key out of someone's stomach, it's game over and they're dead. Sounds pretty gory right? Yes, it is. In fact, Saw III had some moments that almost made me gag.

In Saw III, Jigsaw is dying. His lady accomplice has set up a game for a female doctor to save his life. There is also another guy that has to play a series of games, and his role is somewhat of a mystery until you get to the end of the movie.

I have to say, I wasn't expecting much when I sat down for this movie. I figured that like 99% of most trilogies out there, it would be total crap. I was actually pleasantly surprised at how good the movie was. It tied into the first two movies very well, and there was more than enough gore/shock moments so everyone got their money's worth. It's not going to win an Oscar, or even come close for that matter, but it was still quality entertainment.

Rating: 7 out of 10

Week 10 NFL Picks

Witty Banter to start Josh vs. Brent (-1)
Josh: what up!
Brent: I'm ready to get another @
Brent: W
Josh: you sure you don't want an @
Brent: I started last week, so you're up first
Brent: shut up
Brent: I can't begin to say how disappointed I am with the lack of replies to my power rankings

Kansas City (-1) at Miami
Brent: Chiefs favored by one on the road at Miami
Josh: Ok, Chiefs at Miami, Chefs -1. How are is KC only favored by 1??? Amber takes the Chiefs.
Brent: Oh yeah, I forgot, you're not doing your picks
Brent: So the line essentially asks if the Dolphins can win. Screw it, I say no. You've converted me to a believer.
Brent: Kansas City

Houston at Jacksonville (-10.5)
Josh: Deal. Texans at Jags (-10.5). Go.
Brent: Wow, this is the "been there, done that" game of the week. Remember a few weeks ago when Jax had pretty much this same line, and then got killed? They get revenge this time. Jags in a romp.
Josh: Amber says that the Jags cover too. Man she's good
Brent: 2 agreements so far. what are we betting on this week?
Josh: double or nothing. you win, i pay you $20. Amber wins, we're even
Brent: deal
Brent: just like candy from a baby

San Diego (-1.5) at Cincinnati
Brent: Bolts at Bengals, SD favored by a point and a half...go!
Josh: hang on
Josh: We're back. Amber takes the Bolts to cover. LT runs wild
Brent: I knew you'd take that one. Cincy bounces back against SD this week. Mark it down.

Baltimore (-7) at Tennessee
Brent: Let's see, Ravens favored by 7 on the road against Tennessee
Brent: I'm going upset special here. Titans in the upset. I can't believe I said it...it's like I want to give you your money back or something
Josh: yep
Josh: What a slug! Ravens run away with it. Are you feeling ok?
Brent: you're doubting my picking ability? Whose wife is calling the shots here? That's what I thought.

Buffalo at Indianapolis (-12.5)
Josh: Next is my turn Bills at Colts (-12.5)
Brent: Colts favored by 12.5 at home against the bills!
Josh: Amber says Colts cover easy. Colts D is suspect, but they'll take care of J-Loss.
Brent: Yeah, no McGahee for the Bills. Colts in a romp this week. This one's over at the half.

New Orleans at Pittsburgh (-4.5)
Brent: I guess that means my turn for Saints GETTING 4.5 on the road at the Steelers. Is there something going on here that I'm not aware of? New Orleans is my pick.
Josh: I don't know. I was thinking the same thing. Cowher benched Ike Taylor this week...who cares??? He should have benched Ben - Saints win.

Washington at Philadelphia (-7)
Josh: Next is Eagles (-7) at home vs. the Skins. My turn
Brent: I feel like you're looking at my cheat sheet or something. stop picking my teams
Josh: It's not me!!! Skins barely beat the hapless Boys last week. Amber takes Philly at home to cover.
Brent: Philly is playing like poopy lately. Spread is too big here. Portis gives just enough punch for the skins here. Washington in a close game.

Chicago at New York Giants (Even)
Brent: Bears at NYG in a pickem
Brent: my how the mighty have fallen
Josh: No joke. Who you got?
Brent: Da Bears 143-2
Brent: I'm not sold on the Giants O
Josh: Amber says the Bears win. I can't imagine that they lose twice in a row at home. Ditka rushes for 185 and 2 tds
Brent: Bears are on the road though
Josh: good call. They still win
Brent: ok, so we're both going bears.

Green Bay at Minnesota (-5.5)
Brent: Vikes favored by 5.5 at home vs Favre and the Pack...your turn
Josh: This is Amber's upset special. Pack wins.
Brent: Good pick. Favre always plays terribly in domes, especially at Minnesota. Minny covers
Josh: "whatever"
Brent: awesome

New York Jets at New England (-10.5)
Brent: Pats favored by 10.5 at home against the Jets
Josh: for the record I did not say that, Josh came up that on his own...
Brent: right
Brent: I think someone is getting their man card taken away
Brent: This is a lot of points, and it's a division game. Pats will win the game, but not by 10.5
Brent: J-E-T-S
Josh: Wait your turn!!! Amber says the same - too many points. Jets cover.
Josh: And for the stinker of the week...

San Francisco at Detroit (-6)
Josh: 49ers at Lions (-6). Hang on, the pregnant lady had to pee
Josh: Another upset. Amber says Frisco will cover
Brent: I like the Lions here. We've seen SF's best effort of the season. I just wonder how many yards Roy Williams will get. He's a stud.

Denver (-9) at Oakland
Brent: Denver favored by 9 on the road at Oakland
Josh: Amber says, "Raiders are pretty sucky, honey." She takes the Broncos to cover.
Brent: I think Oakland has showed that they can't score. Denver's D is too tough, and Denver covers the spread, even at the black hole, or whatever they call themselves
Brent: you went out of order
Josh: so shoot me

St. Louis at Seattle (-3)
Brent: you're up for Seahawks favored by 3 at home vs. St. Louis
Josh: Home field along wins it here. Seattle covers.
Josh: So says Amber
Brent: No way. They were terrible against the Chiefs and played against a minor league team last week. St. Louis baby!
Josh: what a homer
Brent: what are you talking about? I never lived there while the Rams were there
Josh: you still love the "loo"
Josh: yeah, i meant to spell it that way
Brent: whatever, you're just pissed that you're going to be down another $10

Dallas (-7) at Arizona
Brent: Cowboys favored by 7 in the desert
Brent: I'll take the Cowboys to cover this one. Tough loss for them last week, and they will rebound.
Josh: I hate the cowboys the longer we live down here. Amber takes the Boys to cover too.
Brent: And you're calling me a homer?

Tampa Bay at Carolina (-9.5)
Brent: Last up is Panthers at home on Monday night favored by 9.5
Brent: against Tampa Bay
Brent: poor ESPN, two stinkers in a row
Josh: Amber says that it's too many points. Bucs cover
Brent: She stole my thunder again. She's right. Maybe she should make your picks every week.
Brent: Tampa Bay
Josh: We'll see, she just may...
Brent: I'm predicting a strong week out of both of us. I guess that's it. I'll get these bad boys posted.

Friday Night Lights - Airdate 11/7/06

Another great episode this week. It always seems to suck me in a little more every time I watch it. I actually get depressed when I'm fast forwarding the DVR and see that there's only 10-15 minutes left in an episode, so it definitely quality entertainment. Sometimes I'll watch other shows and wish the episode was further along, but Friday Nights always leaves me wanting more. I only feel that way when I watch 24, Desperate Housewives, Grey's Anatomy, House and Lost. That's it.

Some random thoughts while watching the show this week:

1) Lyla Garrity's boob shirt during the first part of the show was amazing. Can that win an Emmy of some kind? Surely we can spare one for the shirt's performance this week. I feel like a dirty old man, although she's probably 26, so I probably don't have anything to worry about. (Actually I just checked IMDB, she IS 26. Amazing.)

2) The whole thing with Voodoo's racist comment getting blamed on Saracen's fat friend was well played for the most part, but considering how big of a jerk Voodoo is, I can't believe nobody ratted him out for what he said. I guess we're dealing with high school kids (even if they are 26 in real life), so maybe I'm reading too much into this.

3) Riggins kidnapping Street from the hospital was comical at best. The kid is essentially on bedrest, doing intensive physical therapy just to move his arms, wears a neck brace 24/7 and had a nurse tell him that it's not safe for him to ejaculate...and they can just carry him around with no repercussions? What??? Riggins actually carried him to his truck, and presumably onto a boat for an afternoon away from the hospital. My guess is he's on the field again in another month. Whatever.

4) Loved the part at the end where Taylor stuck to his guns and moved Voodoo to defense since he made the racist comments to the Reyes kid. It looks like it's going to cost Dillon a forfeit in the process, but you have to love Coach Taylor for always doing the right thing. Although I'm a little confused why everyone was panicking about the season being over due to a forfeit at the end of the season. Unless Texas high school ball works differently that Missouri, all you have to do is win your district to make it to the state playoffs. District games are always held at the end of the year. Hopefully the Texas dweller on the blog can clear this up for me. This isn't the NCAA...you can lose a game and still win state.

Show rating this week: 7 out of 10 (no game played, but still very good)
Show rating season to date: 8 out of 10 (and climbing)

DVD Review - Nacho Libre

I have to take a break from my normal sports rantings because I suck at it. I've decided to review Nacho Libre, which I enjoyed so much that I bought it. This was a great movie for those people (like me) who enjoy pointless comedy and Jack Black. I am a huge fan of Jack Black and really liked him in High Fidelity, Shallow Hal and School of Rock. When I heard that he would be play a Mexican Luchador, I had to see the movie (and I did at the theater, originally).

This movie is written and directed by Jared Hess, of Napoleon Dynamite fame. After that movie and Nacho, I'm convinced that Hess is a comedic genius. I loved both movies because of their unusual jokes and original writing. In Nacho, Jack Black plays Ignacio, a monastery cook who feeds the monks and orphans beans with tortilla chips every day. He transforms himself into Nacho Libre, a luchador in "stretchy pants." The comedy is histerical as he trains and wrestles with Esqueleto, his skinny tag-team partner. Two things in the movie absolutely slayed me: 1) when Nacho and Esqueleto wrestle a couple of chupacabres and 2) all of the wrestlers who wear masks in the ring also wear them everywhere else (walking down the street, cocktail parties, etc.).

This movie is great from start to finish and Jack Black, once again, delivers.

Rating: 8 out of 10

The Best Show Nobody on This Blog Watches

Ok if I have to read another political diatribe, I'm going to jab a fork in my eye. Enough already. Getting back into the spirit of what I originally intended this blog to be, I'd like to discuss one of my favorite shows on TV. Even though it has great ratings, I don't know anyone who watches it at work.

That show is House, MD. It's on Fox Tuesdays at 8 pm Central Time.

Everyone I know gets all wrapped up in Grey's Anatomy, which is a great show in its own right. ER is still pretty popular too, although I have no idea why. House is probably better than either of them. Essentially, it's CSI in a hospital. Each week, cranky Dr. House, played wonderfully by Hugh Laurie, and his team of colleagues are confronted with some kind of mystery disease. Their job is to diagnose and treat their patients and send them on their merry way. But it's so much more than that. House is pretty cranky to say the least. He's not afraid to be a dick to anybody. He walks with a limp thanks to a dead thigh muscle and will say anything to anyone. You can't help but love the guy. He constantly belittles his staff because he's convinced he's smarter than everyone, including his best-bud cancer doctor, and Cuddy, the HBIC at the hospital. There are countless laugh out loud moments provided by House (both the doctor and the show) each week.

Even better, and maybe the biggest reason to start watching, is that there is no continuing storyline that you need to understand to enjoy the show. Sure, you might catch some of the more subtle things if you catch the show every week, but it's very enjoyable even if you sit down to watch without ever having seen it before. If you're not already watching, check it out. It's definitely worth your time.

Overall show rating: 9 out of 10

Damn Donkeys

Well, it happened. The worst possible scenario. The Dems took over the House and it looks like they are going to have the Senate as well. I wrote before, that I had faith in the American people. That's gone. In fact, it's shattered. They kept preaching that we need a new direction. What we got, is a new type of government. A government that will raise out taxes, a government that will try to "nationalize" our health care system. There will also be a government program created for everything now, because it takes a village, remember?
Do you know what hurts me the most though? The complete disregard for morals, ethics, and the Condtitution. Stem cell research amendment passed. Morally, it's creating life just to destroy it. Ethically, it's taking multiple billions of dollars from places like California (300 million a year) and China (250 million). Nothing but scientists pushing agendas to get rich. Don't tell me it's not a big business. Finally, the Constitution. Now, no matter how bizarre and ridiculous the test or cloning procedures get. It's protected under the Constitution. Don't think it's not cloning either. That's exactly what it is. That's why they had to amend the Constitution for something that WAS ALREADY LEGAL. Weird huh? Good job Missouri.
I'm done. I'll still talk about God, guns, and gays, but I'm done with American politics. I don't have enough faith in our citizens anymore to vote again. Soon, I'll just buy some land and hole up on a hillside with my family and my guns and let the world pass me by.

Now, definitely, in Nuge we trust!!
Freakin' hippies

Sorry 10-Key

We here at Guysreviewingstuff would like to give a heart-felt and sorrowful goodbye to our friend 10-Key. When we started this blog, he was on board to provide his thoughts and musings with regards to music. He is an absolute fount of worthless music and trivia knowledge and we looked forward to his regular postings. Well, we have been nothing but disappointed by the lack of postings. We couldn't even get 1 out of him! Well let's just say that we're sorry that we are missing out on his expertise, but sometimes drastic times call for drastic measures.

Decision '06

I'm not going to lie to you. I am nervous.
Election time is a love/hate thing for me. I love politics. I love what they are about. I love what they represent, well, originally. Last night on my way home, I saw my state representative for my district on the side of a busy street with a couple of his supporters holding a sign and waving to people, encourageing them to hit the booths today. I stopped, parked my car and walked over to him, just to say thanks. I think in all the mud slinging and all the name calling, we foget that there are still some great people that really do have us in mind when they run for office. I want to say thanks to Will Kraus, Jim Talent, Matt Bartle, Bob Gough. These men, win or lose, take a great deal of time out of their lives, to try to make yours and mine better. I have met and talked extensively to two of them. They are truly good people. I really do appreciate what they are trying to accomplish.

Now, on the flip-side......
Clair McCaskill, Chris Moreno, Mike Sanders, Ike Skelton. These are the ones who enjoy bringing in their personal agendas to build a political legacy for themselves. A legacy, mind you, that is not necessarily the best for us, but what is best for them in their ploy to help take over governmental control. These are the future John Kerry's, Hillary Clinton's, and Nancy Pelosi's. of the world. Cut them off now. Don't let them get that start. Family values are already at an all time low. The divorce rate now exceeds the successful marriage rate. We've made a mockery of marriage by letting destroy the sacred covenant between a man and a woman. We've taken church and God away from everything. If the democrats get control, these things will get even worse. They don't care about these things. They have their own marks on society they want to push, after that, who cares.
Did you know that Russia believed that we were always too strong of a nation to destroy. They always knew that. In fact Gorbachev actually said that he knew the only way to destroy America was from the inside. Make us destroy ourselves. Take our own guns away, and become divided. He said he was never able to do that because of Ronald Reagan.
Now look at us. A divided nation filled with hate, animosity, and secret hidden agendas, and possible on the verge of losing our only means of self defense from our own corrupt government if the left gets a hold of it.
I still have faith though. I believe that the American people as a whole still have faith in this great land. I believe that the conservatives will come out victorious tonight. I believe the laft has done enough to shoot themselves in the foot latley that America can see through the pablum that spews from their mouths.
Come on America, make me proud!!!

The Anti-Hero

Oh Tom. Why hast thou forsaken me, Tom?! I can't believe what I saw last night on Sunday Night Football. Just a few days after I sung his praises and said what a great, clutch quarterback he is, Tom Brady crapped in his hat. Not just any crap, this was a huge steaming load!

Last week (against the Vikings, mind you) he went off for 372 yards and 4 touchdowns. This equated to over 40 fantasy points for me. You can tell how happy I was to see this by my previous post ("My Hero"). I had the choice between starting him or Favre this week, which was a no-brainer because of last week's show. This is the confindence booster he needed, right? Isn't he going to go crazy and start performing like the 3-ring QB he once was? Wrong. Not just wrong - emphatically W-R-O-N-G! Last night, against the best-team-in-the-league Colts, Brady went for 201 yards and 4 interceptions, which equated to 3.35 fantasy points. Can we have a more perfectly opposite performance than this??? He looked completely lost, and now, so is my fantasy season. At 3-6 with just a few weeks left, the playoffs are mathematically impossible for me now. I am the KC Royals of fantasy football. Thanks Tom, thanks a lot.

Ding, Dong, The Witch is Dead!!

That's right! Saddam Hussein was sentenced to hanging! I'm hoping they put it on pay-per-view. I want to watch this bastard's feet twitching at the very end of that rope.
I know you are going to find this hard to believe, but not everyone feels the same as I. The bleeding heart, lefty, liberal, communist, hippie, New York Times doesn't think that is "full justice". The paper, which is opposed to the death penalty, said "Iraq not only needed to hold Saddam fully accountable for his atrocitities, but also to heal and educate the nation that he ruthlessly divided". What a crock! Heal and educate?? Good grief! These hippies are a joke. I don't understand where they get off thinking they know what the Iraqis want. The paper also stated, "....but Iraq got neither the full justice nor the fairness it deserved." Did anyone see the news on this one? I saw Iraqis dancing in the streets. They were burning pictures of the hated dictator. There is one reason why the Lefty Times is making these types of statements. Because of President Bush's statement. GW said the trial was, "a milestone in the Iraqi peoples' efforts to replace the rule of a tyrant with the rule of law."
Let me give you the scoop. This was huge for a country of people who were led by ruthless tyranny for way too long. Hussein needs to hang for his transgressions. Keeping him alive so that others can pay for him to have 3 squares a day and a warm bed to sleep in for the rest of his life would be wrong. The fact that everyone forgets is that the Iraqi people were able to try him in a free court. Could they have done this 5 years ago? I say nay! He was tried in a court of law by a group of his peers just like we do it in America. Imagine that! A free people! A democracy! A court of law! We can't cut and run now. This is a huge first step in the goal to help construct a more civilized and free Iraq from the wreck that Saddam Hussein created.
Just make sure it a tall tree, a short piece of rope, and to hang him high.
Hippies.

A Lifetime of Sports Letdowns

After watching Mizzou piss down their leg in Lincoln today, I can't help but think to myself that I am destined for a lifetime of sports disappointments. I have never followed a team that won anything. Not once. No World Series, no Final Four, no BCS bowls, no Super Bowl. Never. Sure, I've seen some of my teams get close a few times, but that's it. I'll break down each sport one by one.

Major League Baseball - Kansas City Royals
This one is a little weird. I grew up in St. Louis and was a Cardinals fan, even attending Game 5 of the 1987 World Series against the Minnesota Twins. Technically, I was alive when the Cardinals won in 1982, but who cares about the World Series when you're 3? Anyway, we moved from St. Louis after my 5th grade year, and moved to Kansas City after my freshman year. During my formative sports years, I was kind of without a baseball team. The allegiance I had for the Cards faded away, and I have adopted the Royals. Since I have been in Kansas City, they have gotten progressively worse, to the point that they're probably the worst franchise in professional sports. There's nothing like being out of a pennant race by May. There was a brief moment in '03 when I thought maybe the Royals were legit, but they faded down the stretch and proceeded to lose 100 games each of the next three years.

Chances for title in my lifetime: 1-250. It could happen, but it's going to take a lot of luck.

NFL Football - Kansas City Chiefs
I remember becoming a Chiefs fan back in middle school, during the Steve DeBerg years. The football Cardinals left St. Louis when I was really young, so they were never a team I rooted for. The Chiefs have actually had some pretty good teams since I have followed them. They've won the division a few times and made the playoffs on several occasions. Unfortunately, they've never done much of anything in the playoffs, and have choked away a number of games. Back in '03, I thought it was going to be the year that I had a sports breakthrough, although it became apparent down the homestretch that we were going to be easy playoff fodder. Of course, we couldn't force the Peyton Manning-led Colts to punt even once, so it was just more disappointment. The highlight of my Chiefs life came back in '94 (maybe?) when the Chiefs knocked off Pittsburgh at home in the first round, then went on the road to Houston to upset Warren Moon and the Oilers. Then they got stomped by Buffalo in the AFC Championship game. It was like a punch in the stomach. Anyway, the Chiefs haven't won a playoff game since that season.

Chances for a title in my lifetime: 1-20. The NFL has a good balance of teams, so it's possible the Chiefs could catch lightning in a bottle one of these years.

NCAA Football and NCAA Basketball - Missouri Tigers
I'm going to use a little bit of a different measuring stick for NCAA success. Titles are hard to come by...there are just too many teams. So we'll go with Final 4's and BCS Berths. I'll start with football. I'm not really sure what my chances are. Historically, MU football has been atrocious. And even now that we are pretty good, we still piss down our leg during any big game. Seriously, I've never seen MU win a game that I didn't think it should. Ever. Not once. Do I need to repeat myself? The football Tigers might be the most snake-bitten sports team around. The 5th down vs. Colorado, the kicked ball vs. Nebraska, and just enough ineptitude to put a sour taste in my mouth after every season.

Chances for a BCS Bowl: 1-200. The Big XII South is way too good, and we'll be lucky to ever win the North.

For basketball, I've seen the verge of the final 4, but never seen my team actually make it there. The two closest times were in 1994 and 2002, when MU reached the elite 8. In '94, the team had a bunch of seniors who all peaked at the same time. Melvin Booker, Jevon Crudup, LaMont Frazier, Paul O'Liney, Mark Atkins...I can still name these guys. They ran into an Arizona team with Damon Stoudamire and Khalid Reeves, two legitimate NBA guards. Stoudamire ate us alive in the round of 8...it was a freaking clinic. Back in '02, it was really hard to enjoy the trip to the elite 8, since that team underachieved most of the season and barely even made it into the tourney as a 12 seed. They were playing with house money the entire time. They almost pulled out a Final 4 though, and probably would have if Clarence Gilbert hadn't been 1-49 against Oklahoma that day. Oklahoma had a pretty good team, but no real NBA players. Now that Quin Snyder ran the program into the ground and left the cupboard bare, there will probably be a 3 year waiting period before we will even be competitive in Big 12 play, much less successful in the big dance.

Chance for a Final 4: 1-100. Even if you have a great team, upsets happen all the time in the tourney. Of course, you have to be good enough to make it into the tourney first.

That about sums it up. I can't wait until next year, when I get to watch the Royals lose 100 again, watch MU piss down their leg again, and watch the Chiefs rebuild. Kill me.

Harry Truman is rolling over in his grave

I know you are going to find this hard to believe (chuckle), but the terrorists are endorsing the Democratic party! I'm not joking about this. This is for real. Leaders of different terror cells have literally come out and urged Muslims here in America to vote for Democrats in the upcoming elections on Tuesday. In World Net Daily, they actually spoke with some of these terrorists. Jihad Jaara, the senior member of Al Asq........oh, who gives a crap. WND talked with a sand monkey, who leads a large group of sand monkeys, and he stated that they would love for the Dems to be in power because they know how they feel about the War on Terror. He went on to say, "evacuation would prove that resistence works and would compel jihadists to continue fighting until America is destroyed." He goes on to say that America is tired and we can't handle much more of this war. That's why they are encouraging all Muslim Americans to vote democrat. They figure if the dems win, America will cut and run. Do you know what this would mean? If we run, they will chase. They will chase us back to our own country.
If I'm, the President, scary, I know, I send over a little more shock and awe. If they want to play games like that, I would make sure we sent a little message like the day before the election. Monday, I would drop about 200 smart bombs on strategic targets, I would find out who these terror leaders were and send in the assasins. They can't be too hard to find, they are doing interviews for heaven's sake!!
So just a little food for thought. If you vote Democrat on Tuesday, you are voting for the same people that the terrorists want you to. You are supporting their cause. They have stated it plainly. Boy, that would make me proud.
In Nuge we trust
Hippies

Week 9 NFL Picks

Kansas City at St. Louis (-3)
Josh: Well, home team is first, but it looks like a tough call, so I'll let you jump on this grenade
Brent: My pleasure
Brent: I'm going with the Rams on this one. The Chiefs have been pretty bad on the road. There has been a lot of talk this week about Huard keeping the starting spot when Green comes back. I think it's crazy. Rams cover, and this week, we find out why Green is the real QB for this team.
Josh: Oooh, we start with a disagreement. I'm a homer all the way and I think LJ has a big day. Chiefs win.
Brent: STL has lost two in a row. They'll bounce back this week. The Chiefs made a lot of mistakes last week. They're different away from Arrowhead.

Cincinnati at Baltimore (-3)
Josh: Next is Bungles at Ravens, birds at -3 (pretty much a push). I'll take the home team, the Ravens, on this one and they cover.
Brent: I'll agree on this one. The Ravens have a good defense, and Steve McNair has pumped just enough life in them to make them legit. They'll cover. The Bengals don't have it this year. Carson Palmer can't be 100%, or anywhere close. And too many off-field distractions for these guys.
Josh: Notice that Chad Johnson hasn't said anything this week? Interesting...
Brent: No I hadn't. It won't matter. Ravens are feisty.
Josh: feisty...good word

Houston at New York Giants (-13)
Brent: Texans are 13 point dogs at the Giants. They are hard to figure out. Is Carr out?
Josh: I haven't heard, but Rosenfels had a decent game last week
Brent: I'm going to pick the Texans to cover this thing. They beat Jacksonville a couple of weeks ago, and beat them pretty good. Andre Johnson is a dangerous receiver. I'll go with Houston.
Brent: NYG's MO is to win ugly
Brent: Giants take it, but it will be low scoring.
Josh: You taking them to cover (-13)?
Brent: No, the texans will beat the spread
Brent: I meant to say that the Giants will take the game, but win by less than 13
Brent: Better now?
Josh: Carr is back in - Kubiak just benched him to get in his head. Ridiculous. Giants win at home and win big - they'll cover.

Tennessee at Jacksonville (-10)
Brent: Jags favored by 10 at home vs Tennessee. Your turn.
Josh: I think the Jags rebound this week vs. a weak Titan's team, especially since they are at home. They'll cover. Look for MJD to have a big game and Freddie Taylor to go out with turf toe.
Josh: or maybe a hang-nail
Brent: Freddie Taylor...the biggest decision of my weekend will be whether or not to play him this weekend. How messy would the Jax RB situation be in Greg Jones hadn't blow out his knee at the start of the season? Oh and by the way, this is the "bet the Stamper farm" pick. Jags take this one going away. Vince Young on the road against one of the best D's in the league? No thanks.
Brent: Freddie's played well this year. Cut him some slack!
Josh: ok, ok. I'd bet the farm on this one too.

Dallas (-3) at Washington
Brent: Dallas is favored by 3 on the road at Washington. This is the opposite of the bet the farm pick. With a gun to my head, I say Dallas. They really turned it on against Carolina. I had to do it, but I'm taking the Cowpokes here.
Josh: You know what, my "home town" Boys have screwed me over and over again on these picks. I'll take the 'Skins to cover. Now Romo will go for 400 yards, guaranteed.
Brent: Hey, who hasn't screwed you on your picks?

Green Bay at Buffalo (-3)
Brent: Maybe if you actually got a few right, you wouldn't have so much beef with the 'Boys
Josh: Good point. Next one is Pack at Bills, with the Bills at -3. Another push. Why are the spreads so tight this year? Anyway, I'll take Green Bay to cover, and win.
Brent: I think Green Bay is slowly getting back on track. Ahman Green even had two TD's last week...when was the last time that happened? 2003? I can't take the Bills with a straight face. I'm such a cheesehead.
Brent: Go Pack Go!!!
Josh: Hey, you're hanging right on the edge of the Cato Crapper, just barely at .500, so you better be careful...
Brent: I'm feeling it this week. I'm destined for an undefeated week at some point. This may be it.
Brent: By the way, did you watch Lost?
Josh: Yeah, and I'm with Simmons. They jump between too many characters. I'm losing interest Brent: I loved this week's episode. It was really sad to see Eko go though. This weird smoke moster seems to be something different to everyone. It also made a lot more sense before it actually killed someone. It can't be a hallucination, right? So what the heck is it? Anyway, the Saints are favored by 1 on the road at Tampa Bay. I don't like either team, but I think NO can take this one

New Orleans (-1) at Tampa Bay
Josh: Ok, Saints at Bucs with a 1 point spread. Lame. Why do they even do these spreads? The Saints were brought back to reality last week. I'll take the Bucs at home to cover.
Brent: With a 1 point spread, that means I'd have to go with TB to win if I pick them, and I can't do it. New Orleans in a close one.
Brent: Lots of disagreement this week. I think this means I'm on to something.
Josh: dick
Brent: Zing!
Josh: Dolphins at Bears. Do we even address this game?

Atlanta (-5.5) at Detroit
Brent: Don't jump ahead there buddy. Falcons favored by 5.5 at Matt Millen Field. Lots of road favorites
Brent: this week
Brent: you're up!
Josh: Oh sorry, Falcons kill Detroit and cover easily. Vick is a man-child this year and their confidence is through the roof.
Brent: Vick might be the biggest surprise of the season. I'll take Atlanta as well.
Josh: good choice

Miami at Chicago (-13.5)
Brent: and for the exciting Bears/Dolphins matchup. Give me a break. Miami is reeling. Bears are peaking now, much too early. So don't bet on them in January. The'll cover this one though.
Josh: Spread can't be high enough here. Bears cover with Ditka at QB

Minnesota (-5) at San Francisco
Brent: Vikes favored by 5 at Frisco. Go!
Brent: I'm getting pressure over here to hurry it up.
Josh: Ok, I'll take the Vikes to cover. They're pissed after what Brady did to them
Brent: I'm using the same line of thinking, but with the other team. SF got their nuts handed to them this week, so they'll be playing with a chip on their shoulder. I think they'll get this one. SF...what on earth am I thinking?
Josh: Ouch. Are you letting me beat you this week, or what???

Cleveland at San Diego (-12.5)
Brent: Chargers are favored by 12.5 at home vs. the Browns. Scoreboard buddy.
Brent: That's all I can say. This is an awful lot of points, but SD seems to be rolling, especially LDT. I think the Chargers take this and cover the spread.
Josh: Chargers win by 73 points. Cleveland's just terrible. Agreed.

Denver at Pittsburgh (-2.5)
Brent: Steelers by 2.5 at home against Denver. Interesting game.
Josh: How could the Steelers be favored vs. the Broncos at this point? I'll take the Broncos to cover, along with a lot of talk about benching Ben afterward
Brent: Steelers definitely have some super bowl hangover. SD is really going to push Denver in the west, so the Broncos will be ready to play. Broncos take it, and I'm honestly pretty surprised they aren't favored.

Indianapolis at New England (-3)
Brent: Patriots favored by 3 against the Colts. Probably the game of the week here. This is too easy to pick. Manning will beat anybody in November. He just can't win a game like this in January. Colts take this one going away, and everyone becomes conviced that they're a Super Bowl team.
Brent: I'll even go ahead and take Brady on the road at Indy in about 12 weeks
Josh: No way. You already know about my intimate feelings for Tom Brady. Pats cover and hand Indy their first loss of the season (they'll still win at least 13 games, though).

Oakland at Seattle (-8)
Brent: Lots of disagreement this week. Seattle at home, favored by 8 against Oakland caps off this week. You're up!
Josh: Oakland covers. Yes, write it down, take a picture, call Al Davis - I picked the Raiders to cover!!!
Josh: I'm screwed
Brent: Seattle got killed at home by Minnesota a couple weeks ago, and should have gotten blown out against the Chiefs. They have no defense, no Hasselbeck and no Alexander. Oakland was so bad to start the season, that nobody gives them any credit for the improvement they've shown lately. It won't be a pretty game, but no way Seattle wins by 8. Raiders baby!
Brent: And that's it for this week. Time to watch the Office!
Josh: How did we agree on the Raiders? Brutal
Brent: I know. We've come a long way. See ya next week!

Friday Night Lights - Tale of the Tape

Just a few different things I was considering while catching up on Friday Night Lights over the last couple of nights:

Who's your QB? Saracen or Voodoo?
Well, on one hand you have a QB who appears to have no talent. It's like when Jason Street went down, you're left with a ragarm who has never played organized football before. Considering that they have mentioned multiple times that Dillon is the top ranked team in Texas, you'd think that they'd have a serviceable backup. Then you have Voodoo, the Katrina import. First of all, the name "Voodoo" should be enough in and of itself to get him the starting job. What opposing team wouldn't be afraid of the kid? But then I watched the end of the show, where it actually showed Voodoo playing. Unbelievable. He started changing play calls and did a Dennis Rodman impression at halftime.

The Pick: Saracen

Hotter jailbait? Lilah Garrity or Tyra, the town skank?
I went back and forth on this one several times during the course of the last episode. If you go just on looks alone, I think Lilah is the obvious choice. Just overall a more attractive package. But if you start to dig a little deeper, about 20 minutes into the show, I was convinced she'd never even seen a penis. I figured she had a relationship with Jason Street that was one of those weird, make-out-only, high school relationships. Considering she had sex with Riggins, I guess that theory is out the window. Tyra, on the other hand, has never seen a penis she didn't like. I was almost convinced at one point that she was just really misunderstood, not the town skank. That theory was also blown out of the water when she slept with the 15 year old oil executive from LA. Seriously, couldn't they have gotten a guy older than me to play this role?

The pick: Lilah Garrity. You're probably less likely to end up with an STD if you sleep with her. But then again, since they've both slept with Riggins, all bets are off.

Bigger Headcase: Voodoo or Riggins?
Both of these guys clearly have issues. Voodoo is definitely just out for himself. He plainly told Coach Taylor that his goal is to get a scholarship to LSU. Fair enough. But his behavior during the game was completely unacceptable. He totally ignored playcalls and almost ended up costing his team the game. Riggins, by all accounts, is drunk nearly 100% of the time. They have sort of stopped showing him with beer bottles all the time, so maybe he's in rehab. He apparently even played pretty well on Dillon's last drive during the rivalry week game. He opened up some nice holes for Smash.

The Pick: Riggins. He's in a much less important role (fullback). That, and Voodoo is probably off the team, so it's a no-brainer.

Most Interesting Running Subplot: Saracen possibly hooking up with Coach Taylor's daughter

I can't even analyze this. This subplot is entertaining on a number of levels. The scene with Coach Taylor telling Saracen to loosen up, ask a girl out, and fool around in the backseat of his car with her was priceless. Of course, at the time, he didn't know that Saracen had eyes for his daughter. The kid is just so awkward socially, that it's nearly impossible to believe that a girl as hot as Coach Taylor's daughter could ever fall for him. It's almost like Rain Man is the backup QB. I guess it just gives us all hope. I'm definitely rooting for the kid.

Biggest Looming Question: Does Coach Taylor teach at this school or is he just a football coach?

Every high school coach I've ever seen also taught classes in addition to being the head coach. High school coaching is not a full time gig. At least it's not if your wife is the school counselor. Maybe if she was a high powered lawyer, or a neurosurgeon, but not as a counselor. Coach Taylor sits in his office all day watching film and handling the media. Ridiculous for a high school coach. I also couldn't help but notice that the "film" he was watching was zoomed in super close. I think he needs to fire his film guy. No wonder they're struggling to beat some of the teams they're playing.

Best Game Footage: The ridiculous, over the top tackles and blocks vs. Dillon's last drive during the rivalry week game.

What the heck happened on that last drive for Dillon? All game long, we're shown clips of them just getting their butts handed to them play after play. Then all of a sudden, they go 85 yards on a pass, a couple toss plays, and a reverse? It's like somebody turned the difficulty down to rookie after setting it on All-Madden to start the game. Stretching the imagination a little bit there.

The Pick: The ridiculous, over the top tackles and blocks. At least that's cool to watch. Dillon's last drive was kind of anticlimactic.

The Verdict
I like this show more and more every time I watch it. I'm not sure where this can possibly go with Jason Street. Either he needs to have a miraculous comeback or they just need to write him out. After he finds out that Lilah is sleeping with Riggins, he really has no other purpose for the show. Overall, I give this show a solid 8 out of 10.

My Hero

Let me just say that going into Monday night's game, I was uneasy, to say the least. My fantasy team was reeling at 2-5 and I was a stellar 4-8 with my "weakly" NFL picks here on our beloved blog. To top things off, I was down about 39 points in my fantasy match-up with only Tom Brady and Doug Gabriel going on MNF. Then it happened.

I figured Brady would have a solid game against the Vikes. He's had an average season thus far, but seemed to be getting better each week. Then he absolutely went off on MNF. He started the first drive of the game by going 6 of 6 for 94 yards and a TD (with a 46 yard pass to Gabriel - bonus). At that point I was happy and thought I could have the chance to make the fantasy match-up interesting. But he kept going - pass after pass, yard after yard, TD after TD. Brady ended up with 372 yards and 4 TD's, which equated to a 40 point fantasy night. With Gabriel's 83 yards receiving, I ended up with a 9-point victory.

Tom Brady is now my hero and, if it wasn't for my hopeless Chiefs fanatisism, I would be a Patriots fan. I would like to send kudos out to Mr. Tom Brady for pulling one out for me in the clutch (I really didn't want to lose to a team named "Knights Who Say Ne" - nobody knows what in the hell that means). I am now 3-5, which is ever so much better than 2-6, but I do have the likes of Rosco Parish and Maurice Jones-Drew starting this week (with Ronnie Brown going against the Bears D). I think I'll need about 600 yards and 8 TDs from Brady to cover for those douches. Go Pats!!!

I concur!

Brent......I concur! I have never been much into reading novels, but it looks like you might have found some that can keep my attention. And to answer your question, no, there is no support on this war on terror. It was very evident yesterday by some comments made by John Kerry. That's right, 2004 Presidential hopeful, John "ketchup made me rich" Kerry, stuck his foot in his mouth. He was trying to take some jabs at President Bush, but instead turned his sights on the troops themselves. He was talking about education. I guess. He stated that if you work hard, study, and get good grades, you can do well in life. But if you don't do those things, you'll end up STUCK IN IRAQ!!! What a pompous jackass! This was who the left was trying to get elected because he was a Vietnam War "hero". He got a piece of shrapnel in his butt on accident! He might has well have shot himself while cleaning his gun! Then, like a true hippie, came back home in opposition to the war. Like a creature of habit, he's doing it all over again! His apology was non-existent. In fact he said this, "Let me make this clear, as crystal clear as I know how, I apologize to no one for my criticism of the President or his broken policies." I guess I don't know where the line is between free speech and treason.
The war on terror is important, real important. Kerry also said that there are more terrorists that want to kill Americans now than there were on 9/11. Not true. All 9/11 did was give all these sand monkeys the balls to take their fights to the next level. And Brent, there are guys like Mitch Rapp in Iraq. The problem is, our country full of "let's hold hands and save a tree" hippies have made it so they can't even question people because we might hurt their feelings.
Torture terrorists. If we can get information out of them by doing it, then DO IT. If we don't get the infrmation we want, then we had a good time torturing a terrorist. Inexpensive entertainment. They have burned the bodies of American soldiers, drug their bodies thru the streets, sawed off heads while these Americans were alive. Yep, let's be careful not to offend these rag heads.
We will never win the war on terror until we win the war right here in our own country. We have a civil war going on right now on our own turf, believe it. A war between God-fearing, patriotic, Americans and the Left-wing, America-hating, communist wanna-be's. If the Democrats win the Senate and the House next week, and God forbid, the Presidency in 2 years, Heaven help us. They will pull troops, Iran will take over Iraq and become even MORE dangerous. They will cut defense spending and we will become a weak military. People think things are dangerous now? Wait til terrorists walk the streets here because the hippie dems have taken our guns and made sure the sand monkeys feel at home.
Remember this next Tuesday at the polls. Do you want a party in power, who's spokesman is a treasonous coward? We can do something about it.
In Nuge we trust!!
Hippies.